Well, this year brought the big 3-0 and all I told Scott was that I didn’t want a traditional birthday celebration for this milestone. As the day got closer, Scott kept bugging me for a birthday list as he had no idea what I meant by making this birthday a special one. So I finally came up with a list of things he could get me, but it was not a list out of real desire to have the items but more of “please stop asking me.” I really felt that this birthday was going to be an everyday birthday, not a “hey now you’re in your thirties” birthday.

I had made it clear that I really wanted a surprise birthday party but as my birthday neared it was looking like this was not going to happen. About a week and a half before my birthday Scott stated that he didn’t want to ask Molly, my dear friend and coworker, for her assistance in planning something for me as she had just found our her husband’s cancer had returned and he didn’t want to put more pressure on her. So he asked me if I still wanted a dinner and to give him a list of people to invite, which I provided along with contact info. A few days later, Scott informed me that the party was not going to work out and asked what I’d like to do instead. So it was decided we would have dinner out with really good friends of ours, Shanna and Robert, then probably go see a movie.

I was really bummed because I really wanted a kind of special celebration. The week of my birthday I was pretty down and Scott kept reminding me to be happy because my birthday is what I make of it. I tried but to make the situation worse, I wasn’t getting any birthday cards either. Every day I’d come home looking for cards, and nothing. I really started to feel like no one really cared that I was turning 30. Luckily, a gift came from my close friend Connie and my parents sent down a gift as well. That helped me feel better about the upcoming day.

Molly did a really good job of making my last day of being 29 special. She brought her digital camera to work to document the day as well as had a birthday cake for me. There was a balloon and gifts. Molly got me a very pretty necklace with a brown stone (name escapes me). I put it on immediately and wore it all day. Some of my other coworkers gave me gifts as well and sang happy birthday to me. The cake was fabulous and it really helped to brighten my mood. There was still a sense of sadness because I hadn’t gotten any cards in the mail, which NEVER happens.

On the day of my birthday, I actually had to go for additional mammogram views and a breast ultrasound. This was a necessary follow-up to my initial mammogram due to there being a spot that needed further examination. Scott of course told me to wait until after my birthday but I couldn’t. So that is how I started my thirties. I went to Pinnacle Radiology, had another mammogram view done and a breast ultrasound. It was a very scary time, laying on the exam table after the ultrasound, as I waited for the tech to come back in. Things started running through my mind, like what if I have cancer etc. Luckily, she came back in and said the radiologist couldn’t see anything where before there had been a spot so I was not to worry. I felt a lot of relief. Of course this just means I have to get regular mammograms.

From there I went home and opened the gifts I had got in the mail: a beautiful bracelet from Connie and scratchies and pajama sets from my parents. I dropped Scott off at work and, on my way to the east valley to met up with Molly, I decided to get a birthday pedicure. Unfortunately I had to go by myself but it was still fun. I met up with Molly for a birthday lunch at Oregano’s. To my delight, her daughter Brittany joined us, and we had a lot of fun. Glenn, Molly’s husband, dropped by as well. It was a really great lunch and really made the day. My birthday celebration didn’t end there. I went to Halo and got my nose pierced. It was an interesting experience as my eye teared up a lot due to the nerve being pierced. I was very happy with the results and went to pick Scott up at work.

We were scheduled to meet up with Shanna and Robert at 7pm so we went home for a short while then headed for the restaurant. I was very happy to get the chance to have dinner at the Macaroni Grill, as I rarely get there. We walked in the restaurant and Shanna was waiting for us. She said they had already been seated so we entered into a kind of private room of the restaurant where I was SURPRISED by friends and coworkers sitting at a table waiting for me. I was completely, fully surprised. Scott had pulled of a wonderful, tear-inducing surprise dinner for me. I was so happy. When it registered what was going on, I started to cry. I was so overwhelmed. Minus a few people, everyone I had wanted to be there was there.

The night only got better. After ordering and while I was still trying to gather myself after the shock of the surprise, Scott handed me a stack of cards and said that he had been stealing them from the mail everyday, 1. so he could give them all to me together at the party and 2. because some of the cards had included donations to another surprise.

Scott not only managed to put together a wonderful birthday surprise dinner, with the help of Molly, but he also put together a surprise trip to Washington DC. He presented me with a travel bag that included a journal, pen, and an itinerary of some of the things we will see. He even had a picture of my friend Jen, who lives in Maryland, who Scott had been in contact with to arrange for Jen and I to visit with each other while we are in DC.

Everything was arranged. I had nothing to worry about. My tickets were bought. My time off from work had been worked out by Molly. It was truly amazing how much Scott put in to making this big day special for me. Turning 30 was everything I could want it to be and more!

Thanks, Babe, for making my birthday magical.

An online travel guide company found one of my flickr pictures worthy of their Tucson guide so of course I allowed them to use it. Check out the guide for Pinnacle Peak Steakhouse and you’ll also notice Scott has one of his pictures included as well.

I know we can all come up with excuses as to why recycling is “so hard” but it really isn’t. We all need to do what we can to lessen the amount of trash in our environment. Here is a great website for environmental action as well as a list of 21 items that you probably didn’t know you could recycle. Give both a look and maybe, just maybe, it’ll spark your recycling interest.

We had the memorial service for my grandfather today. Originally, I thought that I would just take the morning off from work and then be able to finish out my shift after the service. I am so glad that I ended up taking the whole day off. I was very much an emotional wreck during and after the service. It was well organized and very moving. The chaplain did a wonderful job through the whole process, especially the eulogy. It wasn’t until he paraphrased my contribution to the eulogy that I really broke down. It’s one thing to write the words and something totally different to hear someone else read them out loud. It was such a comfort to have Scott there with me. I am so thankful for his support. I am so glad that I could be at the memorial service, for myself and for my grandmother. I know it meant a lot to her as well. I also felt that it was important to have my family (i.e. my mom and dad) respresented. Unfortunately they couldn’t make it down for the service and I know my mom was really upset by this. At the end of the service we each got to take a live and fake carnation in memory as well as a piece of my grandfathers tie pins/cuff links as a momento of his life. It was all so touching, with tons of pictures of my grandfather at different stages of his life. I was hoping that I would be able to have lunch with my Grandma but the memorial service hit her harder than she thought so she decided to head back home. I know she needs to be home in her own space right now. After saying goodbye to everyone, Scott and I headed home. I pretty much cried on the way home. Today was a very trying day for everyone but it was a great way to celebrate my Papa’s life.

you will be selected for a promotion because of your accomplishments

do not let your instincts run right over your reason

tomorrow will be a productive day. don’t oversleep.

Today I had the honor of going for my first mammogram.

After years of debating with my doctors on whether I am of the right age to get the baseline mammogram done (my mom had breast cancer around age 45), I finally was successful in my request to do so. While most doctors say that if there is family history of breast cancer then you should get your first mammogram done ten years before the age when the family member was diagnosed, I have felt strongly (as has my mom) that I should be able to get a mammogram earlier to help prevent any developments. So during my last yearly check-up, my gynecologist ordered a baseline “high risk” mammogram, even though I am not yet 30.

We’ve all heard the horror stories of how our breasts will get flattened like pancakes and their will be tons of pain. So of course I was a little nervous going into the procedure. I feel it’s my duty to share what it is really like. First and foremost, if you are not normally comfortable with baring your breasts to strangers than this is going to be awkward. You will be asked to remove all clothing from waist up ad put on a gown. Once in the x-ray room, the technician will ask for you to remove one arm from the gown in order to have access to your breast. WARNING: the metal machine is VERY COLD! They take two x-rays of each breast. The first has you stand right up to the machine face forward, with your breast resting on the plate while another part of the machine slowly presses down on your breast. There is absolutely no pain, just pressure. It does feel uncomfortable but not in a “GET ME THE HELL OUT OF HERE” way. The second position requires that you place part of the machine in your armpit with your breast on its side (if that makes sense) while you hold on to the machine. This is probably the most awkward as you are the most exposed.

I learned today that deodorant shows up on x-rays as white specks which, coincidentally is how cancer can show up in mammograms. SO before I did the second pose described above (in which my arm was raised and the machine is laced in the armpit), I had to wipe down my armpits in case there was any residue of deodorant.

The whole process was very quick and like I said, literally painless. After the technician made sure the x-rays had come out all right, I was free to get dressed. I am definitely not fearing the next time I have to have a mammogram done.

It should be about a week before I get the results. Lets keep our fingers crossed.

that special someone loves to see the light in your eyes

your family is one of nature’s masterpieces